


Till Death Do We Part

by LastStopTillLondon



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: Death, F/F, Heavy Angst, Mental Disorder, Schizophrenia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-02
Updated: 2015-11-02
Packaged: 2018-04-29 12:56:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,280
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5128448
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LastStopTillLondon/pseuds/LastStopTillLondon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>LaFontaine has a mental disorder and just got out of Silas Home for the Mentally Ill after two years</p>
            </blockquote>





	Till Death Do We Part

**Author's Note:**

> Disclamer: This has to do with mental disorders that I do not have nor know anybody with them so writing was a challenge. If they aren’t completely accurate, I apologize. This is not meant to be saying that this is how people with certain mental disorders act or need.

Silas Home for the Mentally Ill. Just a fancy name for a mental ward. That’s been their home for the past two years. Silas focused not on treating mental illnesses, but learning to deal with whatever’s left over. They helped the people who suffered with mental disorders deal with it without much, if any, assistance from medication. It may sound like a bad place for some of their patients but their methods are proven to be helpful and Silas has the lowest suicide rate in the nation.

Since they had been doing well and the voices and figures hadn’t bothered them in months, the therapists said they could go home. Even without their meds. Well, they were given a bottle with a refill if they really needed it but they hate taking those pills. In the early days, the meds didn’t do much and as the doctors kept persuading them to take the little pills, they had been thoroughly convinced that the pills were poison, toxic. That the doctors were trying to pod-people them to worship some type of fish god. But those were the early days. The days when they still believed they were an amazing biologist working to save mankind along with a vampire and an in-way-over-her-head journalist who wanted to help everyone from a parasite that would pod-people everyone to serve a giant anglerfish right under the ground.

But, what does that matter now? They were getting out. Out of Silas, back to life on the outside. Back to research. Back to lazy late morning strolls. Back to their wife, Perry.

LaFontaine looked around the small, white-washed room that would have been completely bland if it hadn’t been for the child-like finger paintings that hung up on the walls. The therapists made them paint those crappy things every now and again, then made them hang those stupid things up on their walls. The room was oddly creepy yet, LaFontaine had gotten so used to it in these past two years that it was almost comforting. They touched the walls gently. It was odd but they couldn’t help but feel as though they’d miss this bland, cold room. None of that mattered anymore. As they slung the light bag over their shoulders, they took one last look around that room. Walking out of it, LaFontaine had already begun to miss it.

The rest of the building was the same white-washed, worn down looking place except out there, there were no finger paintings. Although, there were many more windows. A few tables sat in the middle of the large, open floor. Most of the chairs that should have been at the tables, were anywhere but. The remaining chairs at the tables were occupied. Three of those occupants got up at the sight of LaFontaine and walked over.

“Looking just dapper in those clothes of yours,” one of them said fondly.

“Gonna miss you guys,” LaFontaine shuffled their feet. These three were the first friends they had ever made by themself.

“Still don’t know how you’re getting out before me,” another one said, shaking their hand. LaFontaine felt something in between their palms and frowned a little. When they pulled their hand away there was a baggy of self rolled cigarettes.

“Thanks,” LaFontaine smiled, stuffing the bag into their pocket to hide it. A guard came over to escort them out. They waved weakly before turning and following behind as the guard led them towards the exit. They were excited to get out but they were also afraid to lose their friends. They’d have to write them.

Their friends waved back as LaFontaine was escorted away. The guard stopped in front of a set of heavy looking doors for a second before an electrical buzz sounded then a loud clunk! opened the lock. He swung the heavy looking door open like it was nothing and LaFontaine stepped passed the doors that they had only gone through once before, when they were coming in. Behind the door was a long hallway with many big windows, paintings, and even a fake plant or two.

The hallway was long and with each step, LaFontaine gained a new butterfly of anxiety in the pit of their stomach. Who would pick them up? Would Perry be there? Would a car from Silas drive them? So many questions buzzed around in their head.

Another set of heavy looking doors blocked their way. The guard reached out and grabbed the handle. A few seconds passed and he looked up into the camera that was in the corner where the walls and ceiling joined together before he leaned his head to the radio on his shoulder.

“Open the door, Eric,” his gruff voice spoke into the receiver.

Another electrical buzz and another clunk! of the lock as it opened and the door was open. The guard tugged the heavy door open with an annoyed mutter under his breath.

LaFontaine’s chest felt like it was in their shoes as the door opened to the lobby. The lobby was so much more cheerful than the rest of the ward. The walls were painted bright, non-depressing colors, beautiful paintings and pictures decorated the walls, and nice comfy looking furniture made the room complete. Even the, probably fake, plants looked happy. It was such a great atmosphere. Little did anyone know of the blank hell that was hidden behind two sets of doors and a hallway.

Within the room was a familiar figure. A person. A woman. It couldn’t be, could it? They closed their eyes and took a deep breaths. It wasn’t there. It wasn’t real. When they opened their eyes again, the woman was standing. They stared at her for a few seconds before she rushed to them, a blaze of fire-red curls behind her, and embraced them tightly as tears were falling down her cheeks.

This wasn’t going away and none of the other figures LaFontaine had dealt with had ever hugged them before. Actually, they hadn’t been hugged in two years. This had to be real.

“I… Is that really you?” their voice was quiet, tired, and damn near emotionless.

“Yes,” The woman was crying. “Yes, yes, it’s me,”

They felt the sting in their nose before their vision blurred. “Perry…?”

“Yes, LaFontaine. I’m here,” Perry sobbed, mostly out of happyness.

LaFontaine slowly put their arms around her body, still not fully believing it and a bit stiff from the physical contact. She was there. She was actually there. Living. Breathing. There. LaFontaine hugged her tightly, never wanting to let go. Tears spilled and rolled down their cheeks, just happy to be in the embrace of their wife again.

“I missed you so much,” Perry sniffled.

“I missed you, too,” LaFontaine sobbed into Perry’s shoulder. They took a deep breath. Her smell was so comforting. They hadn’t known that it was possible to miss a smell so much.

The hug eventually ended and the two wiped their tears away.

“Let’s go home,” she smiled.

The two walked out of Silas together, holding hands upon LaFontaine’s request. It felt so nice to actually leave instead of staying up super late and plotting escape plans with their ‘roommate’. At Silas, only certain people got roommates and LaFontaine wasn’t one of those people. They had made a friend like them. Another Schizophrenic. The two visited each other’s rooms enough to be roommates, although they had never slept over because the guards made sure that never happened.

The drive home was long and filled with a comforting silence. It filled the space around them like a warm blanket. LaFontaine and Perry’s hands were still connected, almost afraid to let go and the other would be gone again. LaFontaine had a steady gaze out the window and to the outside world. They hadn’t seen more than the trees surrounding Silas for the past two years. It was amazing at how much the outside world changed.

The two were in the car for about an hour and a half before they had finally reached home. Home. LaFontaine and Perry had moved to a new place almost a week before their attack. It wasn’t much of a home to them, nor did they remember much of it. The outside of the building was familiar but it didn’t ring “home” yet. Perry got out first, their hands finally letting go, then LaFontaine slowly got out, clutching their backpack to their chest.

Perry unlocked the door and led LaFontaine inside. She walked in a few paces inside, taking off her shoes and putting them neatly with five other pairs that were her’s and four that were LaFontaine’s. They smiled at how neatly they were lined up and quickly took their shoes off and put them in the cute line.

The house was nothing like LaFontaine remembered. The last time they had seen the inside was when there were still boxes and paint color swatches everywhere. Everything was painted and put away neatly and in their own order. LaFontaine walked around inside the house going  from room to room slowly to analyze everything. They had forgotten more things than they had previously thought. Or maybe Perry had done a great job unpacking in their absence. Both could have happened. Perry did, for sure, painted. What was surprising was that the walls were all the colors that LaFontaine had chosen. The whole house had a homey feel even if they didn’t consider it their home officially. Pangs of guilt knotted their stomach at just the thought of Perry doing all of this by herself.

LaFontaine walked into their shared room with Perry. The bed was nicely made with the comforter from Perry’s old place, bringing back happy memories from their early dating days. On the bedside table next to the bed were a few framed pictures of their wedding. The whole room was just how LaFontaine had left it, making it feel so much more inviting than the rest of the unfamiliar house.

The last room they had to look at was the spare bedroom. Most people would just disregard it but that was where the two had kept all of their stuff while they were trying to set everything up and unpack. It was a total mess for the entire week that LaFontaine was there and it made Perry irritated that there was so much clutter in the room. As LaFontaine opened the door, they were surprised to see that the sea of boxes that had been there were gone. LaFontaine took a few steps in and on their right were only empty, flattened cardboard boxes and a few plastic bins that still had small little decorations that hadn’t gone on the walls yet in a partially opened walk-in closet.

The little pangs of guilt returned to their stomach. Perry must have had her hands full. They shouldn’t have left her to do it alone. As they turned to go see Perry, something made LaFontaine freeze. There was a dark figure sitting in the corner of the bedroom. Reverting back to their old habits, they just locked up and stared at it. A gentle touch on their shoulder made them look away.

“Are you okay?” It was only Perry. Her voice sounded worried. LaFontaine didn’t want to worry her.

“Yeah… Just…” they cleared their throat. “Surprised is all…”

After the small ‘tour’ of the house had ended, LaFontaine and Perry sat on the couch and watched the TV. LaFontaine hesitated for the first 20 minutes before they put their arm around Perry’s shoulders. She turned to look at them, her curls moving beautifully and sending the comforting scent towards them. A smile tugged at the corners of her lips and she leaned into LaFontaine before turning back to the TV. Everything was right again.

Something felt missing, though. LaFontaine turned their head and stared at the blank spot on the wall over their old buffet table. Perry noticed after a while and she looked up, following their gaze.

“What are you looking at?”

“Wasn’t there a picture on the wall before?” LaFontaine answered the question with another question.

“Umm… Not that I remember,”

“Hmph,” LaFontaine hummed before getting up.

They walked out of the living room and down the hallway to the spare room. They went straight to the walk-in closet and searched through one of the plastic bins. LaFontaine easily found what they were looking for. They got up and went back out to the living room and turned to the wall, hanging a painting in the empty space. They backed up a few paces and looked at it. The painting wasn’t anything special. It was just a painting that LaFontaine used to have at their old place. Perry got up and walked over to LaFontaine to look at it.

“It’s perfect. Just what the house needed,”

\--

That night to celebrate LaFontaine coming home, Perry made dinner. LaFontaine sat waiting as patiently as they could in the dining room for their wife to finish. It was especially hard when they could smell all the deliciousness from the next room. Finally, Perry came out of the kitchen with some of LaFontaine’s favorite foods, making their face light up like a Christmas tree. LaFontaine quickly took a bunch of food and started to eat, mumbling praises that got lost on their way through the food in their mouth. Perry just laughed and took some food for herself.

“Did you..” They started after a swallow of food, their expression suddenly changing. “Ever get lonely here?” LaFontaine asked since Perry had been in this big house all by herself for two years.

“Yeah…” Perry admitted but quickly changed the subject. “What did you use to do at Silas?”

“Mmmm…” LaFontaine hummed before they swallowed another mouthful of the wonderful, mouth watering food. “Well, really nothing other than go to counseling, therapy, or whatever they wanted you to do that day. But, I did manage to make some friends,”

“Really? Tell me about them,”

“Well… Where do I start…?” They pondered, wiping off their mouth with a napkin. “I guess I’ll start with J.P. He was like me, a schizophrenic patient. We connected since we understood what each other goes through. We got really close and used to visit each other’s rooms. Even though that was against the rules,”

“My spouse, the rebel,” Perry joked.

“Oh, shush,” LaFontaine chuckled. Perry missed that. She missed hearing that little laugh and that smile that used to make her heart do cartwheels in her chest. “Next is… Kirsch. His real name is Wilson but he likes to be called Kirsch for some reason,”

“You like to be called LaFontaine,”

“And you like to be called Perry. And besides, I have a reason. Now stop interrupting,” LaFontaine joked. Their personality was coming back by only 7 hours back with Perry. “I never knew what was wrong with him… He didn’t speak much to people, except for our small circle of friends. But when he did speak, it was to someone who didn’t exist. He even knew that they didn’t exist… But he made himself laugh. His laugh could brighten a room’s mood in a second.”

“He sounds… mysterious…”

“He was. Then my last friend was Betty. She had Multiple Personality Disorder. And she had three alters. They all had different names and they all liked different things. It was hard for her because she was almost always changing from alter to alter. It was like a group of people were trying to talk and be a part of a conversation but they were all stuck in one person’s body,”

“Sounds…” Perry swallowed a small sip of water. “Interesting…”

“She was,” LaFontaine smiled a little, missing their friends already. “All of my friends would hang out whenever we could. We kept each other sane. I would have snapped and became a vegetable if it wasn’t for them,”

“How did your friends get put in?”

“Well…” LaFontaine thought. It had been a while since they had thought about this. “J.P. got violent and injured himself and someone else so he got put in. Betty… It’s kind of simple to tell,” Perry nodded. “And Kirsch…” LaFontaine paused, thinking hard. Did they have that conversation with him? “... I can’t remember…”

“Well, they sound like a fun time. Maybe we can meet up and all have lunch together once they get discharged,”

“That’d be perfect! I’m sure you’d love them,” LaFontaine smiled big before stuffing their face again with the delicious food.

After dinner was all gone, the two sat together on the couch and watched TV. Perry really enjoyed the company. LaFontaine looked up at the clock which read 9 o’clock right on the dot. They got up without a word and went to their backpack. It sat alone in the darkened entryway, looking as lonely as a backpack could. LaFontaine took out a medicine bottle and went into the kitchen, wondering if he should take it.

“What are you doing?” Perry asked, taking a few steps into the kitchen. “Is everything okay?”

“My medication…” Was the simple answer.

“What about it?” Perry crossed her arms and furrowed her eyebrows into a concerned look.

“I’m wondering if I should take it,”

“Well, you should. They gave it to you for a reason. Doesn’t it do something to help?”

“No. It doesn’t stop much… Only the really violent things…”

“Well…” Perry pursed her lips together a little. “That’s a little pointless…”

“I guess. Yesterday they told me that I didn’t need to take it anymore so they didn’t give it to me. I don’t think I’ll take ‘em,”

\--

“If you’re tired, we can go to bed,” Perry suggested at LaFontaine’s 3rd yawn within a 10 minute period.

“That sounds like a good idea…”

Perry got up first and turned off the TV. LaFontaine slowly got to their feet while Perry was finished turning all the lights off and shuffled over to the entryway for their backpack. They swung it over their shoulder then shuffled down the hallway, Perry now following close behind.

“Um… Hey… Could I… Sleep alone tonight? I’m not really used to sleeping with another person around anymore…”

“Of course. Whatever you’re comfortable with,” Perry smiled before kissing LaFontaine’s cheek softly, their first kiss since LaFontaine was discharged. “Good night, sweetie,”

“Good night,” LaFontaine smiled slightly before going into the spare room with their backpack.

They changed into their pajamas, something they haven’t worn since getting into Silas, and shut the light off. LaFontaine shut the door before climbing into the big bed. The mattress was so much more comfortable than the ones at the ward and the pillows were actually soft instead of the crinkly plastic that they had slept on for the past two years. Suffice to say, they fell asleep almost as soon as their head hit the pillow.

LaFontaine was sleeping well but for some reason, he woke up in the middle of the night. They rolled over with a small groan and looked at the time on the clock next to the bed. A sigh escaped their mouth when they saw the time. 2:48 AM. Something was off though. LaFontaine rolled back over and sat up slowly. When they opened their eyes again, they nearly got scared out of their wits as they saw a figure standing at the food of their bed. The darkened room only made it worse. The only, tiniest, light filtered in from through the curtains over the window. They pulled the blanket over their head and remembered what the therapists had dug into their mind.

“It’s not really there…” They noticed they were shaking. “It can’t hurt you…” LaFontaine repeatedly muttered several times before taking several deep breaths to calm the shaking. A few seconds pause and they pulled the blanket down to look.

Thankfully, it worked. The figure was gone and everything was fine again. But, LaFontaine was still shook up from the encounter so they rolled out of the bed. They shuffled out of the spare room, trying to be quiet as they shut the door. As they turned around to face Perry’s door, they stopped. A small smile came across their face as they remembered how they used to do this when the two were in college. LaFontaine opened the door carefully and slipped into the room. Making sure to be quiet, they snuck into Perry’s bed and climbed in. Just being close to Perry and smelling her scent again made LaFontaine feel safe. They wrapped their arms around their wife and fell back asleep.

\--

Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep.

“Ugh…”

Perry swung her arm and hit the alarm clock before rolling over to try to get some more sleep. The alarm was so annoying. Why did it have to go off this early? Couldn’t she just sleep in for once? The bed didn’t feel so empty this morning, she noticed. When she opened her eyes to check, a familiar head was next to her’s. A small, sleepy smile tugged over her lips and she cuddled closer to her spouse, wrapping her arms around their body gently. With the new position and the warm radiating off of LaFontaine, Perry was just about to fall back asleep.

Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep.

“Ugh…!”

“Mmmm…?” LaFontaine woke up this time.

At first their body tensed, not used to the embrace. But after one inhale, they calmed down. Their senses were filled with the scent they loved and missed so much.

Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep.

Perry pulled away from LaFontaine, noticing that they had tensed. She murmured a small apology to them before getting up and actually turning off the alarm. After a few minutes LaFontaine slowly sat up, rubbing their eyes sleepily.

“What are you doing?” Their voice was deep and gruff from sleep.

“Getting ready…” Perry answered simply as she poked her head out of the closet.

“To do what?”

“To go to work,”

“Work? Oh… Right…”

“Sorry, sweetie,” Perry came back out with some clothes in her hands. She kissed LaFontaine’s forehead and attempted to smooth their messy hair. “I would stay home if I could but I just can’t today,”

“It’s alright. Someone has to work,” LaFontaine shrugged with a small smile.

Perry nodded a little sadly and walked out of the room to shower. LaFontaine rolled out of bed and shuffled to the kitchen. They quickly made a little lunch for Perry to take and a small breakfast that she could eat in the car. By the time they were done, Perry came out and was just finishing buttoning up her shirt. LaFontaine quickly went and brought Perry her lunch along with the breakfast.

“Sorry I couldn’t make something better. I would have if I had known you were leaving,”

“It’s alright. I’m sure it’ll be perfect,” Perry smiled sweetly as she got her shoes on. She already had a lunch prepared in the fridge but she wouldn’t tell them that. This was too cute and sweet.

LaFontaine pecked her lips gently before saying goodbye and watching Perry leave, driving out of the driveway and down the street. They locked the door then turned around, facing the now empty house. What was there to do? They had no schedule or their friends to talk to…

Thinking, LaFontaine went into the spare room and got their backpack. They brought it into Perry’s room since they would be sleeping together from now on. They unpacked their clothes and frowned. Even though they had just washed them the day before, they still smelled like the ward. Sterile… and… too clean.

They decided to do laundry. Why not do Perry’s as well? LaFontaine easily found all of Perry’s dirty clothes since she kept a very neat hamper in the corner of the closet. They brought them into the laundry room and threw in the first load. About halfway through, a voice rang in their ears.

“Is the front door locked?”

Normally, they wouldn’t listen to the voices but this one made them actually wonder if they did lock the door. So, they went to check. Just as they thought, they had locked the door. LaFontaine went back to the laundry room and put in the next load. ‘What to do while they’re in the washer? Dishes would be a good thing to surprise Perry… And maybe some lunch’ Lafontaine thought to themself.

“Things can get in if the door isn’t locked,”

Their mind instantly thought of the parasite that they had spent so long trying to stop back in college. They knew it wasn’t real but they went to check the front door anyways. It was still locked, nothing had changed. Odd.

“If the door is locked then you are safe,”

LaFontaine shook it off. Of course if a door is locked, you’re safe. They went to the kitchen, seeing only a few dishes in the sink. LaFontaine frowned. That wasn’t enough to fill a sink so they did a little patrol around the house, collecting all the dishes they could find. Surprisingly, there were a lot. They brought them all back to the kitchen and then began doing the dishes.

About halfway through, the voice didn’t have to tell them to check the door. They went and checked it on their own free will, wondering why it even mattered so much but as soon as they knew that it was locked, they felt safer. LaFontaine sighed, realizing they were becoming paranoid. They went back into the kitchen and finished the rest of the dishes. The urge to check the door came back but they resisted. The door was fine, it didn’t need to be checked.

They quickly made a lunch for themself then went and sat down on the couch, turning on the TV. They weren’t allowed to watch TV in the ward so it was like finding what it was all over again. They got sucked in by a few shows, the hours flying by. Eventually something came on that they weren’t very interested in so they started to zone out a bit.

“The door…”

The voice reminded him. A small feeling of being unsafe started to crawl up their spine but they just shook their head and ignored it. It only got worse. The voice started layering over itself two maybe three times and it began chanting.

“The door… The door…”

The words rang through their head. LaFontaine covered their ears and huddled their knees close, trying to make it stop. The voices kept repeating the words until it started to get painful. They got up and ran through Perry’s room and sat down in a corner of the closet, feeling safe there. But just by being in a safe place doesn’t make things like this stop. The voices continued and continued, pestering and pestering them about how if the door was unlocked it would be unsafe. About how things would get in. They didn’t want the parasite again. They didn’t want to be mind controlled again. Some part in their mind knew it was all a lie. It knew that the voices weren’t actually there but the panic was real. If that was real, what made the voices and things they were saying any less real? They finally gave up and pulled their knees to their chest. LaFontaine just rocked back and forth, tears brimming at the torture.

“P-Perry…” LaFontaine whimpered lowly. “Perry…” They whispered over and over.

They cursed themself for not taking the medication the night before. They cursed the doctors for telling them they didn’t need the medication anymore. LaFontaine got up and crawled to their backpack, grabbing the bottle of pills. Their hands shakily poured out their dose then they swallowed it dry. They sat back against the wall in the corner by the bed, waiting for it to take effect.

They waited and waited for what seemed like forever. The voices finally went away. But now, their “imaginary friends” that they had grown up with came back. They hated how the two had changed.

“Look at you,” one sneered.

“So pitiful,” the other laughed.

One sat down on the bed, just staring at them and the other stood between LaFontaine and the door. To them, these two were as real as Perry but they knew that they weren’t. They wanted so hard to believe that they weren’t real. But it was difficult when they were right there, laughing and teasing you.

“What’s your wife’s name again?”

“Isn’t it Lily or something?”

“Perry…” LaFontaine whimpered, beginning to tremble.

“Where is Perry, LaFontaine?”

“Do you even know?”

“Sh-She’s at work…” LaFontaine looked at the two beings who they once called friends. They had grown up so beautifully but their wickedness was something that grew as well.

“How do you know?

“It’s not safe out there,”

“How do you know that that parasite isn’t running rampant in her brain right now?”

“How do you know that that even is the real Lola?”

“N-No…” LaFontaine was stern, even though they didn’t feel like it on the inside. “Perry is safe. The parasite is not in her head,”

“Really?”

“How do you know?”

“Do you really think someone like you could protect her?”

“Of course I can protect Perry,” LaFontaine stood their ground, not wanting to give in but the ground they were standing on was already so very cracked. “I would give my life to protect Perry,”

“You tried to kill yourself because you couldn’t fix the parasite problem,”

“How can you protect her if you can’t even protect yourself?”

The two laughed together and LaFontaine just buried their face in their knees, holding back tears. They knew that if they started crying, that’d just be something else for the two to pester them about. LaFontaine looked at the bottle of pills in their hand and he poured more out, just wanting it all to stop.

At that moment, Perry came into the room. She rushed to LaFontaine, getting down on her knees and took the bottle away from them. About 20 had already poured into their hand.

“How many did you already take?” Her voice was heavy with worry. It made LaFontaine’s heart hurt. Their “friends” were right. How could they protect Perry when they were so broken and worthless? “Lafontaine! Answer me!” Perry was going into full panic mode

“O-Only two…” LaFontaine whispered, the tears starting to fall.

“Oh, thank goodness,” Perry pulled LaFontaine close, wiping away a few tears. “Don’t scare me like that…”

LaFontaine wrapped their arms around her. She was perfect, an angel, and it was there job to protect her. They promised themself right then that no matter what happened, they would have to protect Perry. Even if it cost them their life.

\--

Perry had to go to work again for the rest of the week. LaFontaine didn’t like it because the parasite could have been out there but they had to let her go. Regardless, they checked if she was still the Perry that they knew and loved every time she came back. They spent the weekend together, catching up from their way-too-long break. The next week, sadly, Perry had to return to work leaving LaFontaine alone again. Whenever they were alone, their paranoia would came back and they would feel unsafe unless they were in their room. The voices and figures returned, torturing them. LaFontaine made sure to take their medication, never forgetting.

Today, in particular, was very long. The voices kept tormenting them about the door, making them check again and again. They followed along until they remembered what they had been taught at Silas. “They warn you about pointless things. It doesn’t matter” LaFontaine thought, resisting the voices to check the door.

They let out a sigh, needing a break. They went to their backpack and pulled out a ziploc bag of self-rolled cigarettes. Betty had taught them how to roll them, then got them into the habit of smoking. When LaFontaine pulled one out and got a lighter, a knock at the door came. LaFontaine got up and answered the door. Upon opening it, a large smile spread over their face. A tall man was standing in the doorway, wearing a small smile of his own.

“Kirsch! What are you doing here?”

“Discharged today…” Kirsch said, seeming like he was only half talking to LaFontaine.

LaFontaine stepped to the side and let their friend in.

“I was on my way home… And I thought I should stop somewhere,” Kirsch explained, looking around the house.

“Why’d you come here? How did you know this was my house?”

Kirsch was silent for a bit, as if listening to something, then nodded. “Yeah, I thought so. You told me about it once,”

“You remember that?”

“No…”

LaFontaine didn’t push to know more. It was probably one of the things that would be easier understood about Kirsch if you didn’t dig into it.

“You were going to smoke again…” Kirsch stated, not looking at the things in LaFontaine’s hand.

“Yeah… I’ve been meaning to stop but-” they started, their hand reaching up and scratching the back of their head.

“Could I have one?”

“Sure,” LaFontaine said as they went to go get another. When they came back, Chanyeol was staring at a blank wall, as if someone was there. “It’s been forever since we smoked together,” LaFontaine handed their friend the cigarette then the two walked outside together.

The two leaned against the front wall of the house, smoking their cigarettes after lighting them.

“How’s Tao and Xiu?” LaFontaine asked after a long exhale of smoke.

Kirsch shrugged. “Normal. Wasn’t Tao getting out soon?”

“Is he?”

“Yeah, you’re right. He is,” Yet another confusing sentence said by their tall friend.

Kirsch was never one to talk much when they smoked so they dropped the conversation and just enjoyed his company. Their first cigarettes ran out and LaFontaine dropped theirs, stomping it out.

“I want another?” Kirsch asked, staring forwards.

“I’ll get you one,” LaFontaine said before going to get another.

They hurried back to their friend and gave him his next cigarette. LaFontaine was never someone to smoke more than one at a time but it was nice to just smell the smoke. The two stayed in silence again while Kirsch smoked.

“We should probably stop smoking these…” LaFontaine sighed, rolling the lighter back and forth in their fingers.

“But it makes you feel better. Just like me,”

“Just like you?” LaFontaine grinned. “You make me feel better?” They were amused by Kirsch’s comment.

“Of course. Why else would you keep im-” Kirsch stopped mid-word and dropped his bud. He stomped it out. “I have to go,”

LaFontaine watched their friend leave, wondering what the giant had meant.

\--

When Perry came home that day, LaFontaine hugged her like every other day. But today, Perry smelt something different.

“Is that… Nicotine?” Perry asked.

“Yeah… It’s a bad habit that I picked up at Silas,” LaFontaine admitted, looking away slightly. Perry sighed softly. They knew that she didn’t like smoking.

“How did you smoke? I don’t have any cigarettes here…”

“JP taught me how to roll them. I had a few left from the ward,”

“How many did you smoke?” Perry crossed her arms and shifted her weight to one side.

LaFontaine looked down a little. They knew they should stop but it was a terrible habit and it was really hard to stop. “I only smoked one. But Kirsch came over and had a few,”

“Kirsch? Your friend from Silas? What was he doing here?” Perry’s eyes widened a little and her brows started to furrow.

“Yeah, he was discharged today and he stopped by on his way home,”

“Well… Maybe we can invite him over once we see him again,” Perry smiled a little but it was clear she was a little upset.

“Of course! I think you’d like him,” LaFontaine smiled, trying to ignore the fact that she was upset.

Perry smiled and shook her head slightly before remembering something. “Oh, yeah. At the end of the month, we’re going away for a week,” her arms relaxed from their crossed position under her chest and she brought them up and wrapped them around their neck gently.

“Really?” LaFontaine felt a little excited. They’d never been on vacation before. “Where are we going?” They rested their hands on her waist.

“It’s a surprise,”

\--

True to Perry’s word, the two went on vacation at the end of the month. Perry had kept it a secret on where they were going until they had gotten into the plane and the flight attendant said on the overhead where they were going.

“Tahiti?!” LaFontaine was very excited, bouncing in their seat a little and hugging Perry, placing a kiss on her cheek. They’ve always wanted to go but never had enough money. “How in the world did you pay for it?”

“I saved up for the trip while you were at Silas,” Perry shrugged with a small grin. It had been so long since she’d seen LaFontaine this excited. “I thought it would be nice to get away for a while after you got home,”

The plane ride was long but to LaFontaine, it passed quickly. After the plane landed, they excited and got their luggage. LaFontaine was all too excited for their vacation to start.

“Oh, there’s another surprise,” Perry said, turning to fac them.

“Another?” LaFontaine was getting really excited.

“Yep. You know my friends that we hung out with in college?”

“Uh, huh,” LaFontaine nodded, their eyes sparkling. They could guess what was coming.

“Perry! LaF!” A familiar voice shouted.

“Laura!” LaFontaine called, running towards the closest friend of Perry’s they had.

The two met in the middle and hugged, rocking side to side.

“It’s so good to see you!” LaFontaine said before looking up at the others who were laughing at them. They pulled away from Laura. “It’s so good to see you guys too,”

“Thanks for the warm welcome,” Sarcasm was heavy in the brunette’s voice to match her ‘I just don’t care’ look, but that was just how her face was.

“I feel appreciated,”

“Carmilla, Danny. Would you stop making my other half feel bad?” Perry brushed a few curls out of her face as she made it to the group, dragging a few bags of luggage behind her.

“Other half? You got married? Why didn’t you tell me! I would have came to your wedding!” Laura said, or rather whined.

“Sorry, L,” LaFontaine ruffled her hair a bit. “But you weren’t really around then,”

“It wasn’t even that fun,” Carmilla scoffed. “There wasn’t enough sweets and the bartender stopped giving me drinks after a while,”

“Oh, shush. It was beautiful,” Danny backhanded Carmilla’s shoulder.

“Sorry that I didn’t cry like you did,” Carmilla rolled her eyes.

“Alright, alright. Let’s not argue,” Perry stopped the impending fight. Her friends never changed

“I’ll show you the wedding pictures sometime,” LaFontaine smiled at Laura, elbowing her playfully which made the small girl light up again.

The five gathered their bags and left the airport together. They all got into an expensive looking car which Carmilla decided to drive. She drove them away from town which didn’t take long since the island wasn’t that big. LaFontaine had their face practically against the window the whole time, amazed at the beautiful vegetation. Quickly, they spotted a circling of huts that were on stilts over the ocean’s water. Carmilla had always been rich, because of her parents, so she had vacation houses all around the world.

She parked back by the beach and everyone climbed out of the car, gathering their things once again. The place was beautiful and LaFontaine was amazed that practically no one was around. Everyone dispersed in search of a hut to be theirs for the rest of the vacation. Perry and LaFontaine walked side by side along the boardwalk and looked around at all the huts. The boardwalk went around in a circle and there were huts dotted all around with one big central one at the front of the circle.

Perry and LaFontaine found one that somehow seemed so much bigger on the inside and had a beautiful view of the sunset and a distant island off to the left. There was a little kitchen to the right when you walked in and furniture surrounding a huge tv towards the middle of the room. To the left was a bedroom. In it was the largest bed that LaFontaine had ever seen sitting against the wall. There were dressers for their things on either side of a door that led out to a little balcony and steps down to the water.

The first thing they did was unpack, putting away all their things in the dressers. Just about when the two were done, Danny came into their hut.

“Hey, guys!” She called into the empty space.

“Thanks for knocking,” Perry said sarcastically as she stepped out of the room, LaFontaine following closely to look at their friend. Danny just ignored it.

“Carmilla and Laura wanted to go for a swim by the big hut. Wanna go?”

“Of course! Just give us a bit to get ready,” LaFontaine gladly accepted. It had been a very long time since they had been swimming and they had never been in the ocean before.

Danny nodded and went away, leaving the two alone. The two went and got on their swimming suits and grabbed a few towels.

“Does Carmilla own this little circle of houses?” LaFontaine asked as they went out to the living room, fixing their trunks.

Carmilla’s family owns this island. They rent it out to people who want to vacation or honeymoon here, so yes,” Perry smiled, fixing a strap of her swimming suit. It was a modest blue and white one piece with a low cut back that was exposed with her hair pulled up into a bun.

“They own it? Wow… She’s definitely rich....”

Perry chuckled. “Very,” LaFontaine walked up to Perry and caressed her skin gently, placing a small kiss on Perry’s shoulder. “Come on,” Perry said, turning to LaFontaine with a grin. “Let’s not keep them waiting,” She gave them a small peck on the lips before grabbing their hand and leading them out the door.

The two walked down the boardwalk to the big hut, holding each other’s hands the whole way. As they got to the big hut, the boardwalk opened up to a big platform with many tables for people to sit and eat. There were stairs down to the water and a few meters out were three bodies, swimming and splashing each other in the clear water.

“Hey guys! Come on in!” Laura waved them over.

“You wanna go in?” Perry asked, turning to LaFontaine.

“Of course!”

\--

That night, Perry and LaFontaine were standing on their little balcony, watching the sunset over the ocean. The other three were probably in their own huts or all together in the main hut doing something but the couple just wanted a bit of privacy.

They were having a nice time, just a tiny bit of cuddles. Perry glanced down at her watch, noticing the time.

“Oh, LaFontaine…”

“Hmm?”

“It’s 9 o’clock…” She turned her head to look towards LaFontaine.

“Oh…” LaFonaine pulled away from the small embrace that the two shared and looked at Perry. “I… didn’t bring them…”

“What? Why not?” Perry turned around to look at them.

“Because I just don’t need it when you’re around,”

It wasn’t just that being around Perry made everything go away, no one can do that. Perry just made it easier to calm down. Her presence made figuring out what was real or not simpler. She just helped them relax.

\--

The vacation was going nicely. It was three days into their little getaway and LaFontaine was laying on a wooden reclining chair in front of the main hut, soaking up some sun on their pale-as-the-moon legs. They watched everyone else mess around in the water. LaFontaine didn’t really feel like going in today. Plus, swimming around with them made them sleepy once they got out.

In the corner of their eye, they spotted something. LaFontaine turned to look at it and a smile came over their face. A familiar figure was leaning against the wooden railing of the boardwalk that connected the beach to the huts. LaFontaine got up and went up to the familiar figure. It wasn’t just a figure, it was a person. The girl was kind of tall, taller than LaFontaine but had nothing on Danny. The girl spotted LaFontaine walking over and a smile spread to her face quickly.

“Oh, hey LaF!” the girl’s voice was kind and held a kind of intellect to it.

“Hey Natalie,” LaFontaine grinned. “What the heck are you doing here?”

“I- well we were discharged a few days ago,”

“Really? What about JP? Is he still in?” they didn’t want to think about JP being all alone in Silas without anyone to talk to.

“Yeah…”

“How’s he been doing?”

The girl shrugged. “Normal,”

The two talked for a bit, joking around and catching up. The girl made LaFontaine laugh a little at her intelligent jokes. Half of the words out of her mouth they couldn’t understand. In the middle of joking around, the girl grew suddenly silent. She stared off, no longer moving and staring past everything. LaFontaine leaned back against the rail and just waited for her to come out of it.

The girl stayed like that only for a few seconds before blinking repeatedly and looking around. Her gaze settled on LaFontaine and she rolled her eyes a bit. The intelligent glint in her eyes was now gone. Her whole posture changed, everything practically changed in those few seconds.

“LaFontaine,” her voice was deeper and her arms crossed over her chest. Had she been muscular, she’d probably look like a bouncer standing guard outside of a club.

“Will. It’s been a while,” LaFontaine smiled. Will wasn’t their favorite of the altars but they had to admit, they kind of missed him.

“Yeah, well… I guess I just wanted to see you. It was boring after Kirsch left and JP is a total nutcase,”

“Hey, JP’s a nice dude,”

“Yeah, yeah. Oh, hey. You got any smokes?”

“Um, yeah. I think there are some in the house. Let me go check,” they stood up straight and walked towards the main hut, their friend following along with a hint of boyish swagger.

She stayed outside as LaFontaine ran inside. They quickly ran around, looking through drawers for cigarettes. It took a few minutes but they found a drawer in the kitchen with a half full packet of cigarettes along with a lighter. Despite being half empty, it still looked new so they assumed that it was Carmilla’s. They knew they should leave it alone but they took some anyways. Hopefully she wouldn’t be too angry. LaFontaine grabbed the lighter before quickly rushing back out, not wanting to make their friend wait anymore than she was.

They walked up to her and she grabbed one with a bored look painted on her face. The two both lit a cigarette and took their first inhale. LaFontaine had never smoked a real cigarette before, only the ones that they had rolled back at Silas.

“So, how did you get here?” LaFontaine asked, exhaling a breath full of smoke.

“I told you,” her voice was monotone, kind of bored but mostly annoyed. “I was discharged,”

“No, not that. I meant… here,”

“We walked over here from the water,”

“No,” LaFontaine laughed a little. “I meant in Tahiti. What are you doing here?”

Their friend just shrugged. “Thought I’d get far away from Silas…” Their friend paused to inhale another lungful of smoke. As she spoke, the smoke came out like dragon’s breath. “Tahiti seemed like a good spot,”

“So do you live here now?”

“At the moment, no. I just got here a few days ago,”

“So did I. Why didn’t I see you at the airport?”

“You weren’t looking…” Their friend finished the cigarette and stomped it out on the boardwalk.

“I wasn’t? I’m sorry,” LaFontaine would have loved to have Perry meet some of their friends.

“No… It’s not like that… You didn’t want t-” she stopped mid-word, zoning out again.

LaFontaine dropped the topic and stomped out their cigarette, even though it was only half gone. Perry was right, it was a terrible habit and they really needed to stop. They waited for their friend to become responsive again and looked out to the gentle waves surrounding the boardwalk. Without warning, arms suddenly pulled them into a tight hug.

“LaF!” The deep voice she had just a minute ago was now gone. All the swagger was gone too.

“Betty, I’ve missed you,” LaFontaine chuckled, squirming to hug their friend back.

Betty pulled away and looked towards the main hut. “Oh, look! Reclining chairs!” she said as she happily walked off to go sit on one.

LaFontaine followed and they sat down on a chair next to her. The two sat together staring out at the others splashing in the water for a while.

“Oh… I have to go,” Betty suddenly said, sounding a bit sad.

“What? Why so soon?” LaFontaine asked, not wanting to have their friend go so quickly. “You know you can stay. There are a few more huts that are empt-”

“Don’t worry. I’ll see you around sometime,” Betty promised as she got up and walked off towards the beach. LaFontaine felt as if that promise wasn’t going to be kept but they sighed softly, watching Betty walk off.

“Hey, LaFontaine,” a voice called from the water, making them look. Perry was walking up to them, just getting out of the ocean.

“Hey,”

“Where’d you go off to?” Perry tilted her head to dry off some of her hair with a towel.

“Just over on the boardwalk to the beach,”

Perry frowned, her nose scrunching. “You were smoking…”

“Yeah…” LaFontaine suddenly felt guilty. “A friend from Silas was here. We smoked together,”

“It looked like you were talking to someone… Who was it?”

“Betty,”

“Oh, where is she?”

“She just left,”

Perry looked a tad bit confused then looked around, first the boardwalk then around by the huts. She just laughed it off and shook her head slightly before turning to LaFontaine. “I’ll have to meet her the next time she comes,”

\--

Now, five days into their vacation, there was no sign of Betty anywhere. Even though LaFontaine really doubted that they’d see their friend again, it was still a little disappointing.

LaFontaine was sitting on the reclining chairs again. Even though LaFontaine didn’t go into the water with the others, they were still having a fun time just relaxing. They just sat and thought. About Perry. How perfect she was, especially for organizing this whole thing. How Perry had taken them to a fancy restaurant once, took them to art museums back in college, and the late night swims together they did each night. LaFontaine just sat and thought with a soft, distant smile on their face.

A whistle pulled them out of their little daze to see Perry climbing out of the water.

“Hey sweetie. What are you thinking about?”

“You,” LaFontaine grinned, their gaze fixing on their curly haired wife.

The two shared a smile before Perry bent down and they shared a kiss, pulling away not too long after because of the catcalls and whistles coming from the girls in the water. Perry just pulled away, looking out at the girls and shaking her head.

“Hey,” she smiled, getting an idea. “You want a hug?” she asked, backing up a bit and holding out her arms towards LaFontaine.

“No, you’re all wet,”

“Oh, I think you want one,”

“No!” LaFontaine laughed and got up, running away.

Perry followed after but quickly caught up to them. She hugged LaFontaine from the back, getting them all wet. LaFontaine squirmed and pulled away, still laughing. They turned and shared another kiss before LaFontaine pushed Perry back towards the water gently. Perry grinned and walked back down to the water.

LaFontaine went back to their chair and laid down on their tummy to dry their back now that it was all wet. They watched the girls mess around, smiling softly at them.

“Look at them…” A voice said. It didn’t seem to come from any specific direction but it sounded close. LaFontaine knew that this voice wasn’t real. They knew they shouldn’t encourage it but they were so content and the voice didn’t seem to be destructive.

“I know… Perry’s friends are really cool…” Lafontaine answered out loud. Their tone was a bit quiet and distant but it was still an answer.

“Yeah. Carmilla is really cool. Look at how close she is to Perry,” LaFontaine frowned. “Has Carmilla always been that way? Or has she changed her mind?”

“Of course she’s always been that way,” LaFontaine knew what the voice was trying to do. “Well, she has grown up a little bit but she’s still the same,”

“Well, look at Laura,”

Laura, at that moment, dunked Perry jokingly. Perry came up and shoved Laura lightly only to get pulled close by her. Laura tried to kiss Perry’s cheek but Perry leaned as far back as she could, trying to get away.

“She’s trying to infect Perry’s mind,”

“No… That doesn’t exist,”

“As far as you know. It’s been awhile since you’ve seen Laura. How do you know she hasn’t changed? Or that the parasite isn’t in her? You have tested her in years,”

“No…”

“Well how about Danny? She’s a jack of all trades. Perfect at everything…”

“... Stop…”

“How could someone be so perfect if something wasn’t controlling them?”

“Please stop…” Tears started to sting their eyes, making their vision blurry. LaFontaine wanted to believe that the voice was only speaking lies but there had to be some truth. They wanted Perry to be safe and they knew that the parasite wasn’t real but it was true. They had been away from Laura, Danny, and Carmilla for so long. How did they know that they weren’t infected?

LaFontaine couldn’t take it anymore. They stood up and walked away from the others. If they kept looking, then they would just get paranoid and they didn’t want to believe that the parasite existed. It was about time to make something to eat anyways. That would distract them. When they reached the main hut and was about to reach for the door the voice came back.

“Turn around,” it was a simple instruction so LaFontaine did what it said.

They saw Perry’s shoulders being held by Carmilla and Danny was holding her feet. Laura stood in the middle and poked at her stomach, making her laugh and squirm. With the current state of LaFontaine’s mind, they took it in a completely bad way.

LaFontaine couldn’t take it anymore. They wanted to believe that it was fake and that nothing was going on, just harmless fun but they couldn’t. LaFontaine ran back to their hut and into their shared room. They bunched up in the corner, more and more voices started coming to them. They tormented them about how Perry couldn’t be safe out here. Or how Laura, Danny, and Carmilla were trying to get her infected. LaFontaine could only sob, they wanted to protect Perry but with all these threats, which ones were true? How could they protect her if it was fake? Or what if it was true and they weren’t doing anything?

“Perry…. Perry…” LaFontaine whimpered pitifully.

The voices began to make fun of how pitiful they looked. They knew all the points to hit to make them cry harder. LaFontaine kept whimpering Perry’s name.

Within no time, it was Perry who came through the door. She rushed to them and pulled LaFontaine close, the voices slowly going away.

“LaFontaine, oh my gosh…” Perry was still wet but neither of them cared. “I saw you run inside and… Baby, are you okay?”

LaFontaine hugged Perry into them. “I am now…”

\--

For the rest of their vacation, Perry never left LaFontaine’s side. Perry always asked LaFontaine to come into the water with them, went into the kitchen to cook with LaFontaine, and when everyone went to town to go shopping for souvenirs, Perry was next to LaFontaine the whole time. The voices left them alone and Better never visited.

Their vacation ended too quickly and now it was time to go and leave their friends.

\--

The next week the two were home, Perry didn’t have work so she was home all day together with LaFontaine. LaFontaine loved it because they knew that Perry was safe in the house but also some private cuddle time was exactly what they both needed. Sadly, time passes all too quickly and before they knew it their time together was over. LaFontaine was once again, left home alone while Perry worked.

‘Wonder what she’s doing right now…’ LaFontaine thought to themself.

“You know what’s happening to her,” a voice answered. LaFontaine just sighed and tried to push it out of their head. It couldn’t make them do or think anything. “You know why she’s gone all the time,”

“Work?” LaFontaine answered with a sassy tone and a raise of their eyebrow.

“Her mind has been… compromised. She’s not the same Perry and she’s off doing things to help-”

“You’re wrong,” LaFontaine shakingly interrupted.

“You’re lying to yourself,” LaFontaine couldn’t muster a response in time. “You know she’s different. You know that something’s different. You know that some part of her has changed,”

“I-I’m not lying to myself. She’s working hard so we can live in this house,”

“You think that your little attempts to keep this place safe has worked? Someone like you? Don’t make me laugh!”

“You’re wrong,” LaFontaine’s voice shook. This place was safe… wasn’t it? Their gaze shifted to the door.

“You can’t even help yourself! Remember what happened last time? You failed! You! Failed! You failed so hard that you tried to kill yourself because you couldn’t even keep yourself from the parasite,”

“WRONG!” LaFontaine covered their ears. They didn’t want to hear anymore.

Their knees buckled and they fell to the floor as the voices started to chant things. The voices made them doubt how well they could protect Perry but most of all how Perry was under the influence of the parasite and was being mind controlled by the angler fish so that it could get to them.

Suddenly, the voices changed. They started chanting again.

“The door… the door…” Layering over themselves.

LaFontaine got up and ran to the door, making sure it was locked. They wanted this to stop. The house was safe. They were safe in here.

“Not that door…” the voices said. “There’s another door… a different door,” the voices chanted.

LaFontaine’s head was dizzy as they frantically searched for the door that the voices were talking about.

“This door… this one…” they said as they got to the spare room door. The same room that they first saw a figure in and the same room they spent their first night in the house.

They found a key for it in the hall closet and they locked it.

“This door is more safe. This is where you can be safe. For sure,” the voices chanted as they faded away.

LaFontaine went into their room and found a long chain from an old necklace. They put the key on it then put it on, tucking it away under their clothes. They would make sure the door was always locked so if they needed it, they could be safe.

\--

When Perry came home that day, LaFontaine was curled on the kitchen floor, rocking back and forth. Perry ran to them and pulled them in for a hug, wanting to make sure they were okay. LaFontaine just broke down in tears.

“Why won’t they leave me alone…?”

\--

The rest of the week went on as normal as it could for LaFontaine. The voices constantly reminded them to check both doors. One door was always locked and LaFontaine always checked. Sometimes the they would catch the front door unlocked and they would thank the voices for keeping them safe. If they took their medication, then the voices would go away but they would decide themself to check the doors. Always.

The night before, LaFontaine had noticed that they run out of their pills. They would have to tell Perry about it when she got home. LaFontaine didn’t take their medication the night before since there was only crumbs and already broken pieces left.

The voices didn’t let up today. They kept bugging them about the doors. What made them so antsy today? LaFontaine always checked and they were always locked.

Right after lunch time, a figure came in the middle of the voices tormenting them.

“You can’t hurt me… You aren’t really there…” LaFontaine told themself as they stared at the figure. They repeated this in their mind even though there were little twinges of fright flickering around in their chest. The figure didn’t move.

It said something but the speech was so distorted it sounded like demonic gibberish. LaFontaine was caught off guard. Figures apart from their “imaginary friends” never spoke to them and those ones looked like real people. This just looked like a darkened figure.

The figure’s face transformed into Perry’s. The figures had done this to them before back in Silas, tricking them into thinking that Perry had come to visit them but it was just a cruel joke to the figures when they would go running towards her, wanting a hug, but instead hitting the wall at full force.

LaFontaine stood up and brushed passed the figure and went into the living room. They could deal with figures but the voices were usually what got them. If they ignored the figure, then they usually would go away. Instead, the figure just followed LaFontaine and grabbed them by the wrist. LaFontaine’s eyes widened and their chest swelled with anxiety. They had always been told that the figures couldn’t touch them. They couldn’t harm them. But this one’s grip was so tight on their wrist.

LaFontaine panicked and pulled away, running down the hallway. The figure followed along and LaFontaine ran into their shared room. Maybe being around Perry’s scent would make it go away. They were starting to run out of ideas. They ran in but the figure stopped the door from closing. LaFontaine ran to the bed and they buried their face in the pillows, taking in Perry’s scent and hoping, praying, that the figure would just leave.

The bed shifted from weight and LaFontaine sprung off the bed quickly. They quickly reached into one of their dressers. Under a stack of their old clothes was a gun that LaFontaine had hidden a long time ago. LaFontaine went to the spare room, knowing they could lock themself in and be safe until Perry got home. They unlocked the door quickly and ran inside. Again, the figure stopped the door from shutting and LaFontaine went into the corner, sliding down to the floor and covering their eyes. This room was safe. The figure would leave here.

Something touched their arms and they flinched.

“LaFontaine…” It was Perry’s voice but the figures had done this before too, tricking them into thinking Perry was there when she wasn’t.

The figure wasn’t going away and the door was open. This room was no longer safe. They needed to close and lock the door again. This room would be safe again.

Lafontaine stood up and held the gun out at arm's length, pointed straight at the figure. Their hands were shaking but they just wanted to be left alone. Why wouldn’t this figure go away like the others did? The figure seemed to stop and back up slowly. LaFontaine closed their eyes.

“Leave me alone,” they muttered forcefully, another thing they were taught at Silas. ‘Be forceful. You don’t want them there. Let them know that.’

The figure stepped closer with more distorted speech.

“I said. Leave. Me. Alone.” LaFontaine said through gritted teeth, their eyes opening to look at the figure. Just looking at it made them afraid but they couldn’t let them control their life anymore.

The figure just took another step closer, making the floorboards creak, and held a hand out. The distorted speech felt like it was ringing through their brain.

“LEAVE ME ALONE!” They pulled the trigger.

Once.

Twice.

Thrice…

A few seconds silence then the figure dropped to the ground. LaFontaine dropped the gun, their hands stinging from the recoil. They shoved the figure under the bed, wanting it out of sight. They quickly went out, locking the door again.

Now they were shaking, their mind going a mile a minute. LaFontaine sighed and went outside, grabbing some cigarettes. Normally they wouldn’t smoke more than one but now they had the intention of smoking through the rest of their supply.

\--

Perry came back at her normal time and LaFontaine ran into her arms, crying and telling her about the voices and the figure. Their voice was shaking and sobbing too much that they couldn’t tell about how they grabbed the gun or that they shot it. Perry called to get more of LaFontaine’s medication and she cooked dinner that night.

\--

Days carried on as normal as they could for LaFontaine. For some reason, there was a “problem” with their medication so they couldn’t get it anymore. When they looked into it, they were told that they didn’t need it anymore. And, LaFontaine believed it. They no longer saw figures but the voices always bugged them about the doors. Every 20 minutes they had to check and make sure they were both locked and secure.

Days eventually turned into weeks. Nothing was out of the ordinary, other than the voices. One day, though, Betty stopped for a visit. Betty was herself, not one of her alters. LaFontaine happily invited her in and together they had coffee. Betty kept looking at the front door.

“You should really check that door…” She said flatly during a lull in the conversation. The statement made LaFontaine tense but they shook it off and answered as coolly as they could muster.

“Wh-Why? There’s nothing wrong with it…”

“Things can get in if the door isn’t locked,”

LaFontaine froze. “How did you…?”

“I have to go,” Betty got up to leave but before she left, she turned and looked at LaFontaine then her gaze turned to the hallway. “There’s another door down there too…” LaFontaine tensed again. “You should keep it locked too,” A small smile pulled Betty’s lips into an odd, near creepy smile. “I know about your secret,” LaFontaine’s mind went blank and they could feel the color drain from their face. “By the way, it’s starting to smell…”

And with that, Betty left. LaFontaine locked the door after her then made sure both of them were locked. They shoved a towel under the locked door in the hallway. ‘How could she know… Something that happened 3 weeks ago…’

Perry came home at that time. She never asked about the towel shoved under the door and LaFontaine never told.

\--

A few days passed, the voices started coming more and more often, always making them check the doors. The only thing that changed is that Kirsch came to visit. He had the same cryptic message that Betty did. He kept talking about the doors. He wouldn’t shut up about the doors but he wasn’t really taking to LaFontaine, until the looked at them square in the eye.

“I know your secret. Keep it locked away… Keep it hidden…” Then Kirsch left without another word.

\--

A few more days passed. It was almost a month since the incident. LaFontaine couldn’t stop thinking about it. They sat on the kitchen floor, clutching their coffee to their chest and staring at the cabinets across from them. ‘1 month… 1 month… it doesn’t seem like that long ago…’

“You’re a bad person…”

“I’m not…” LaFontaine answered the ringing voice in their head.

“You’re a bad person… Look at what you did…”

A figure was in the doorway of the kitchen. LaFontaine stood up and put their cup on the counter. It wasn’t just any figure. It was Perry.

“LaFontaine… What are you doing? Are you okay?” Perry asked.

LaFontaine was just about to answer but they saw themself brush passed Perry. Perry just turned around and followed the other LaFontaine into the living room. LaFontaine followed, dazed. What was happening? Perry grabbed the other LaFontaine’s wrist. Their eyes were wide with fear before they bolted off down the hallway. Perry was right on their heels.

LaFontaine watched it all, following them into the bedroom. They shook their head as they saw the other LaFontaine unlock the spare room door. LaFontaine swallowed the growing lump in their throat and unlocked the door to watch the rest of it happen before their eyes. Perry was now squatted down and touched the other LaFontaine’s arm.

“LaFontaine…”

The other LaFontaine stood up and held out the gun to Perry. LaFontaine’s heart lurched. ‘No…’

“Leave me alone,”

“LaFontaine… Put the gun down… Where did you even-”

“I said. Leave. Me. Alone,”

“LaFontaine… Just put the gun down… Let me help yo-,”

“LEAVE ME ALONE!”

Once.

Twice.

Thrice.

The sound echoed through LaFontaine’s mind and chest, making their ears hurt but they watched without flinching. They saw Perry’s body fall to the floor and their whole world fell apart.

“Killer…” A voice came into their head. It rang through every part of their mind, making their brain pound against their skull. LaFontaine grabbed their head.

“No… I-I didn’t…” LaFontaine tried desperately to deny it.

“You did it…”

“Killer…”

“He’s dead…” The voices all chanted, layering over each other.

It was no longer in their head. The voices were ringing through the house. The sound came from the walls. It filled the air, making it hard to breathe. It run through the floorboards. It seeped down from the ceiling. They were just chanting, never ending. LaFontaine covered their ears and dropped to the floor.

“LEAVE ME ALONE! WHY WON’T YOU JUST LEAVE ME ALONE?!” LaFontaine screamed at the top of their lungs repeatedly as they got up and tore up the made bed.

They flung the blanket and the sheets. The pillows were chucked at the walls. They were just about to flip the mattress when all of their strength left them. All their anger was gone. Their throat burned from all the screaming.

It was quiet in the house now.

Jut quiet.

So painfully quiet.

LaFontaine’s hands shook as they reached out to grab the landline. They sunk to the ground, holding in their tears as they dialed the all too familiar number.

“Hello, 911. Please state your emergency,”

LaFontaine was breathing heavily, trying to keep from sobbing. They didn’t hear the lady on the other end at first. “Uh… Hello…?”

“This is 911. Do you have an emergency?”

LaFontaine’s breath shook. “Y-Yes…”

“What’s the nature of your emergency?”

LaFontaine’s eyes settled on something sticking out from under the bed. They swallowed the lump in their throat. “My wife…” LaFontaine’s voice cracked, holding in a sob. “She’s dead…”

“What is your address?”

“Uhh… I don’t… I can’t… remember…” LaFontaine picked up the cold, metal object that was on the floor next to them. It felt heavy in their shaking hand. They stared at it before they looked at the foot sticking out from under the bed.

“I’m tracking your call…”

LaFontaine let out a few sobs, trying to not all but break down.

“Okay. Hang on. The police and an ambulance are on their way. What is your name?”

“L-LaFontaine…”

“LaFontaine, where is your wife now?”

“... Under the bed…” Only now did the smell get to them. They shook their head, their breath shaking again.

“When did this happen, LaFontaine?”

“... A little more than a month ago…” LaFontaine’s voice drifted off in sobs.

“LaFontaine… So-”

“I didn’t mean it!” LaFontaine sobbed out, letting everything out. “I didn’t know it was her!” They cried and cried, their hands shaking. “The figure was so dark and-and it was all so daunting… I didn’t know it was her!” LaFontaine cried, pulling the phone away from their ear.

“Is that your excuse?”

LaFontaine looked up and saw Kirsch standing there, covered in blood.

“You didn’t mean it… It wasn’t her…” His voice was higher pitched, mocking their voice. “Pathetic…” The word stung like venom in their veins.

LaFontaine just sat there and took it. They just watched Kirsch reach under the bed and pull out a handful of maggots on decaying flesh along with a small bone.

“You didn’t mean it!” Kirsch yelled accusingly, flinging the handful at the window.

LaFontaine sobbed harder and harder. Kirsch rolled a ring to LaFontaine before vanishing right in front of their eyes. The ring was Perry’s wedding ring. LaFontaine gripped the object in their hand tighter before they put it to their head. The gun was familiar but all so foreign.

They had killed an angel… A perfect angel… There was no place for them anymore. So they pulled the trigger.

Once.

That was all it took.

There was no pain.

But their ears rung.

It was over quickly.

Just once and it fixed their mistake.

Who could forgive them for killing such a perfect angel?

 

**Author's Note:**

> I'm always open for requests/prompts over on my [tumblr](http://the--harbor.tumblr.com)!


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